you've been robotized!

technology has infiltrated our lives for quite some time and we've been using it extensively for various aspects. In comms class, i learnt of the relationship between communication and technology. with the presence of technology, communication has been made limitless. no boundaries. or at least, thats how it has been perceived to be.

but today,we'll talk about CMC. Computer Mediated Communications. it is simply defined as " any form of communication using computers and computer networks that allows access and interaction between people and databases all over the world."

so this would include your e-mails, msn, facebook, friendster, virtual games and basically most of the things that teenagers nowadays LIVE FOR. oh wait..even this BLOG is a product of CMC. so yes. we're all pro- CMC.

CMC can bring us soo much joy and happiness..BUT WAIT. lets look at how CMC has further invaded our lives, or made stalking easier.

In Singapore, according to Straits Time dated 14th of march, "School attendance checks go digital". wow. just wow. and Cedar Girls' is one of the three secondary schools to participate, along with Presbyterian High and Anglo-Chinese. The reason to incorporate such technological advancement in the school system is so as to derease admin work and manage disciplinary problems such as absenteeism and truancy. Students are to tap/scan their ez-link cards/ fingerprints upon entering and leaving school. For Cedar, parents can check through an online portal to find out what time the child came to school or what time they left school after activities. parents will also be instantly notified if the child fails to attend school via sms. scaryyyyy. its like being watched all the time! stalker parentals!

when i was in cedar, i never skipped school. or at least, i never played truant. BUT that does not mean i'm such an innocent angel either. see, i have STRICT parents. then and now. my mother never really gave me freedom to hang out with my friends. i had to go home IMMEDIATELY after school. hence, the devil's workshop in my brain, produced great lies to make things possible. I would always tell my mum that i have extra lessons, remedials (which is very much believe-able since my grades were bad), CCA, CCA meetings and all sorts of excuses just to be back home late. and in that time,i would actually be out in Toa Payoh or Tampines with my friends having a good time. Imagine if during my time, this system was administered! i would be trapped in a smaller cage! goodness. i am so relieved that they decided to do this after i graduated.

my worst fear would be if SIM decides to participate in such nonsense as well. i'll be fuming mad if they did. as many of my friends know, i STILL have strict parents, and i STILL have a curfew. drum rollll...10 pm! and that is only IF i am allowed to go out...then my curfew is 10. other than that, its HOME straight after school. goshhh. i will be so dead if my mum gets a hold of the time table of my classes! hahah. but i am pretty sure (hopes and prays) that SIM gives their student more freedom than that.

in any case, i feel that some times, CMC is not at all good. when it falls onto the wrong hands, it may invade people's personal space or create tension and conflict. sometimes...its just good to NOT know everything. cheers.

writer's block is indeed apparent. sigh.

joke of the day!

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked a tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone,
"Here lies Strange, an honest man and a lawyer". The inscriber insisted that such inscriptions would be confusing, for passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone.However, he suggested an alternative:
He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer." That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark, "That's Strange!"

thank you for not choking

due to the fact that i got such depressing results for comms, i am going to take the opportunity to use a topic and be all angsty about it. it has been bugging me for quite some time now, and well, here's the chance to let it all out.

to all smokers,

how did you feel when the gahmen kept increasing the price of ciggarettes? angry? yes? but did we protest? no. from $3.50 a pack, it has come to $11.20 for 20 sticks of ciggs. we showed no signs of disapproval other than to puff our stress away even more. THEN, they decided to put disgusting horrific, SUPPOSEDLY true pictures on each pack to show us what harm smoking can bring us. did we protest? no. instead we sniggered, laughed about it, even created a collection of the pictures. THEN, what did they do? slowly slowly BAN places from us smokers. BAN. yes. BAN. first it was the air-con places (duh), then it spread outwards to bus stops, queues, coffee shops (partially..but i will comment more on this) outdoor places that we all just love to chill, have fun and enjoy a stick or two with our friends. its getting OUTRAGEOUS these days. because NOW, they ban even more places like CARPARK, door entrances, staircases and MANY MANY MORE.

what have we done to you non-smokers? exactly what?! do we blow our smoke into your faces? do we PURPOSELY stand next to you while smoking and let you inhale our smoke? yeah yeah. stop the nonsense on second hand smoking okae? if you're so scared, when you see a smoker, RUN for your life.

i myself, have been very tolerant with such beings. when i see a morsel of distortion on their face (ie. cringe) when i light up a ciggarette, i would move away. i also dont smoke when im near children, or at least i wont blow the smoke in their direction. if im crossing a road, and i happen to be holding a stick, i would walk at the outer most section of the crossing and not be in between people to spread the smoke around. most of my smoker friends are like that too! so if WE can be considerate to all you non-smokers, why must you keep denying us places to smoke? it gets unbearably irritating!

last time, i LOVE the fact that i can always choose the alfresco of a restaurant so that i can smoke. that is of course if my non-smoker friends dont mind, (see, we seek approval to show our consideration for others).it is a lovely feeling when you have eaten to your heart's content and then smoke afterwards. its heaven.( all you smoker get your hands in the air and say HELL YEA!) but what have they done? they made EVEN the alfresco, the open air part of the restaurant to be non-smoking. or even if they allowed, they only have up to TWO tables for smokers. what in the world...see...to all you non-smokers..at first, restaurants set up alfrescos for people who smoke and for those who cant take the cold of the air condition. unless you are one of these people, STAY INSIDE. dont be bothered with what goes on outside. and if you're the latter, the ones who cant stand the cold of an air con, and HATES the smell of smoke..tell you what...BRING A DAMN JACKET AND STAY INSIDE.

oh and im not done yet. SOME OF THE MORE IRRITATING non-smokers, would sit in OUR table. yes. OUR table. the one that allows us to sit there and smoke. see, again, it goes two ways now honey, if you dont want us to smoke at your non-smoking table, then jolly well dont take up our seats if you're not smoking. kapish?

then, yet another brilliant idea to irritate smokers is the "no smoking at door entrances, 5 metres of every building, multi-storey carparks and...OH. your mum's house!" annoying jfd&$%#. you know how annoying it is that singapore is SMEARED with buildings all over. so for a smoker to not be able to smoke at door entrances areas and 5 metres of every building, thats as simple as saying that we cant smoke ANYWHERE! because every 5 metres or so, we're into the 5 metre radius of yet another building!! and and, why cant we smoke at multi-storey carparks?whose life have we endangered there? bearing in mind that cars emits smoke too. so no one should use a car. because if you smell car's exhaust fumes, you may DIE.

oh ridiculous ridiculous. AND. they set up this small yellow boxes outside of shopping malls where they appear to be smokers-friendly. BUT if you scrutinize further, they're actually torturing us even more. the boxes are small. so if ten smokers were to obediently follow the law and smoke there, we will all be crammed up. andi've always realised that NONE of the smoking boxes EVER offered chairs. i mean. we'rehuman beings too you know! let us have a place to sit or something. smoking is to chill out and relax. not to strain our veins on our calves and feets!

oh the rantings can go on. how does this even relate to COMM 101 you ask? its all about the media theories we learn. this example can cover at least three. that is, the agenda setting function, media hegemony and the cultivation theory.

agenda setting function

media's ability to raise importance of an issue in the public's mind through repeated coverage. hmm. remember those disturbing advertisements that they show on tv about smoking. how one of them end up to be totally faked? yes. the fact that they have "no smoking" signs repeatedly showcased everywhere? yes. the fact that they intentionally link all sorts of health issues to smoking? whereas in the past, they only focused on healthy diet pyramids and eye exercises? yes. change of focus. we become the target. case closed.

media hegemony

media represents the views of the powerful elite. how many of our ministers smoke? maybe discreetly, we dont know...but in the public eye, none of them are smokers. furthermore, the gahmen wants to create singapore into a health hub. therefore, unhealthy habit (see..not habitS) should be eradicated. realise that gambling is also an unhealthy habit? but what? what did you say? the IR will be ready soon? ohhh. great for singapore's economy i hear. case closed.

cultivation theory

message in media do not influence audiences attitudes directly but, cultivated indirectly. in the past, when more places were allowed for smoking, even those smoke-haters cant say much. those neutral parties say nothing and accept life as it is. but now, with the placement of those horrible signs, the smoke-haters now have a reason to say all they want and involve the law to outcast the smokers. neutral parties will be swayed to think likewise, since now, the law is involved. its a gradual reconstruction of perception. slowly, people might just associate smokers with druggies. -shake head-

its a sad sad life now for the smokers.imprisoned in their own land. outcast by society. and we're only left with the company of those 20 loyal friends that come in a pack and ease our tension, stress, sorrow away.

(ps: i've always been a supporter of the gahmen. but not this one. defnitely not this one)

my culture my pride

Culture defines us. defines who we are, what we do and how we think.

i guess for me, culture plays a major role in my upbringing. i'm malay. malay malay. no mix.no culture crisis. you know how sometimes when you ask someone what is their race, they'll go," oh, my grandma has dutch blood, my great grand uncle is german, my grandma on my father's side is indian and my great great grandfather is portugese." interesting isn't it? how some people are so insecure about their own roots, that they have to give us every single race in the spectrum that they might possibly have. sometimes, when their answers get draggy, i'd rephrase my question and ask them, "what's the race that is written in your ic" and they'll be like.."oh..malay". total retards.

the malay culture is basically a collectivist culture. we are highly interdependent. suppose, there is a wedding function or make that ANY function that one family were to hold, everyone else would help out. the immediate family, the extended family, friends, neighbours, everyone would get involved. this is what we call "gotong- royong" . people sacrifice their energy, time and money for the benefit of the family hosting the function. we practice self sacrifice for the ingroup members. It can also be seen as having mutual sympathy for one another, where the community goes through thick and thin together. when one is short-handed, there'll always be a helping hand. there is great readiness to cooperate with ingroup mmembers.

collectively, we believe that the women are the weaker sex (something i'm still rebelling against..but i guess, thats the individualist in me) and they are to stay home, and provide necessities for their husbands and family. the malay women are known for their soft spoken personality, their grace and their submissive characters. this is well portrayed by our cultural dance, that speaks of the characteristic of a traditional malay woman. on the other hand, malay man are portrayed as strong, chivalrous brave leaders of the family who hunt and fish as a livelihood to feed his family. NO WONDER i see a trend of MCP in many malay men. hmmm. These are just some of the examples of social norms and duties that are expected of a traditional malay person and are defined by a group rather than of self.

The malay culture can be considered a high context culture where there are restricted codes and contextual cues. places much emphasis on politeness and "face-saving" takes. in the old days, when presenting themselves in front of the king or "Raja", any gestures that showed one's behind or the sole of the feet to the king is considered as disrespectful and an insult to the king. Also, in cases like maybe, premarital pregnancies, malays usually don't hold any extravagant weddings as it is seen as something shameful and a disgrace to the family's name. they will usually proceed with just a minor ceremony involving only immediate families. it can be said that malays places much value in family pride and what the community thinks of them.

in my opinion, the malay culture is rich, vibrant and ever-lasting. it holds many values like humility, pride and respect. as much as modernisation has depleted many of its beliefs, ie. gender roles, it is here to stay and still influences many of the younger generations. in our very own words, "takkan melayu hilang di dunia" which means, malays (or the culture) will never cease to exist in this world.

so tell me, what's your culture? how has it defined you? have you ever been embarrassed by your own culture? SHARE

joke of the day!

Why men are like computers. (one for the ladies!)

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9. A better model is always just around the corner.
8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
6. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3. The lights are on but nobody's home.
2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1. Size does matter

Are YOU a groupie?

chill...chill..no sexual innuendos to the title okay. steer away from that thought for awhile..

I was flipping through my secondary school annual books that day and i reminisced about how much fun AND sufferings i went through back in my alma mater, Cedar Girl's Secondary School. that's right. i was a from an all girls school. no surprise where i developed my feminist streak. You know, back in the days, we had so much pride in our school. there's so much unity amongst us and definitely, a generous amount of attitude shown to our neighbouring schools. we always had that strong sense of belonging to Cedar and would always be defensive when others spoke ill of us. there's even this unwritten rule of how you should wear your school uniform.but of course, it is NOT like how they told us to, in the student handbook.

How to look good in the infamous blue and grey

1. always buy your blouses at least 2 sizes bigger. means if you're a 38, 40 would be nice.
2. ALWAYS wear your tie no matter how merciless the sun may get. and to not tighten it so much. let it hang a little loose. but not too loose such that you look sloppy.
3. your skirt should be a little tight to show some curves, but not too tight that it may create an impression of promiscuity on adults.
4. the ratio of your skirt lenght to your blouse lenght should be 1 : 3.
5. always always tuck in your blouse BUT get as much of your humungous blouse out. (rmb the ratio)
6. when exiting school, ALWAYS take out your nametag BUT NOT your school badge. (yes, our identity reinforced despite the infamous blue blouse and grey skirts)
7. and your socks should always be ankle socks. usually we will wear normal socks in school and then magically transform it into ankle socks later in the day. OR the more rebellious ones will just come in ankle socks and suffer the consequences when caught by disciplinarians.

but well, not everyone will adhere to this unwritten rule. its not a rule, more of a guide. some will adhere to parts of it. like for me, having conservative parents, the 1/3 skirt rule..was frowned upon. so yes, i was THAT girl with the knee lenght skirt. not really a fun thing espescially when your teachers start using you as a role model of how your skirt lenght should be. grr.

One other groupie that will always have a place in my heart would be my NPCC groupmates. yes yes. i was from a uniform group. one that was physically torturous, mentally exhausting, and delightfully pleasant. like Cedar as a whole, we too had strong pride in our squad. we had an identity. HERMES. our name was of a greek god. NOT the fashion label. excuseee me.

we were closest to one another throughout 4 years in Cedar. we eat together, study together,had outings together, tortured together, fought together, did stupid things together. we saw everyone's sweat, tears,smile, blood in all 18 of us. we would think alike, fill in each other's sentences, comfort each other in times of sadness, cheer in loud unity. everything there is to do as a group, we did. we were exactly as how COM101 put us to be, " a collection of individuals who developed interdependancy, shared patterns of behaviour and a collective identity due to prolonged interaction with one another" wicked way to slip in a definition aye? haha.

but like all REALLY close-knitted groups, we developed what they call, the GROUPTHINK symptoms. due to the fact that we were so united espescially when we were in our cadet days, we always thought that we were the best. although it may not be the truth in many different factors. but this belief was what gave us strenght and optimism. we shared stereotypes. the ins and outs of npcc. we'd constantly look at other units of our batch and compare them to us. slightly sniggering most of the time. can't blame us. because when you're in a group, everyone else falls below you. its not a matter of individual arrogance, but more of an inculcated belief. like i said, we had that disease...GROUPTHINK. whenever faced with a problem, we would sit down and rationalise together. majority always wins. and the minorities won't really voice their unhappiness when the votes are in. its like there's this acceptance of everything in the way we work.

although, there will be a time when internal tension arrives and thats where we have to combat this GROUPTHINK symptoms. we'd usually have a "thrashing out" session where everyone is of equal status. no leader, no follower. everyone will voice out their opinions, disagreements, grudges and attempt to make peace with everyone. everyone would be the Devil's advocate at some point of the session, giving multi-sided opinions and alternative ideas to every problems raised, like the cashier des doleances a.k.a list of grievances of the french revolution.

ahh, the nostalgia.. groups are what makes you feel this sense of belonging. it could be a temporary group, maybe one that last for a month? or a group that withstand the trials of time. either way, they allow people to feel acceptance, the need to be included, the need to sometimes control, the need for affection. just as how William Schutz have intelligently put it. and when a group does not meet these interpersonal needs of an individual, most likely they will change groups until the groups are deemed satisfactory to them.

in my humble opinion, everyone admittedly or not, desire to be in a group (even those who declared to be a non-conformist). it is some sort of an escape of the reality of life whereby everything is ABOUT YOU and you alone. how you manage your time, how you deal with your problems, how you want your future to be, how when you die, you bring nothing but yourself to your grave. it is but of course, just my two cents.

what about you? what are your thoughts about being in a group? needed? or complete exxageration and soooo over-rated?

FUN FACTS:

Bananas relief menstrual cramps. (sorry guys, none to relief PMS)

Ever thought of living your life sdrawkcab?

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

(spoiler alert)

If you were given a choice, would you want to live your life backwards? Being old and helpless when you're young, and thrive while you are in your 40s or 50s? It gives a new meaning to 'life starts at 40" indeed.

Watching this movie triggered the romantic person in me (afterall, i was that girl who listed an embarrasing list of "what i want on my first date" in COMMs class) . Totally reinforces my believes that True love exists but not without sacrifies. many many sacrifices. (very apt too, considering that i'm typing this on 14th feb..hahaha. im so loserfied to be at home, doing assignment on Vday. oh well)This movie brought me down to tears seeing the hardship one has to go through in an attempt of having the love of their life. But of course, like all tear inducing movies, they must have some tragedy involved. and that would be, for the lead actor to be born with a disease that reverses his physical appearance. he is born old and grows younger. oh..an he is none other than Brad Pitt (cue for LOUD SCREAMS AHHH!). okay, minus the fact that he totally cheated on my fave actress jennifer anniston and now having a collection of kids around the world with that particular someone who has humungous lips that makes aspiring wannabes go for botox. urgh.

oh, digression is indeed a skill.

Anyway, Benjamin who was born with this disease, was abandoned by his father who got disgusted over his appearances BUT not before he made a promise to his dying wife to "find him a good place". whatever that means. i guess they already intended to not keep the child. or maybe, after giving birth, then the mother decided on that. oh well. So the father dramatically took the child and RAN RAN RAN till he found a house to which he left the baby. that house happen to be a place for the old folk. (very apt for that baby to grow up). he was taken care of by the caretaker of the old folk's home who decided that as ugly as he look (the doctor actually called him an IT! and CREATURE some more!) he is still God's creation and should not be abandoned that way. so what can be learnt people? that LOOKS play an important part of how people perceive you. not many people are as kind and pure as the caretaker. and in this case, when you're a baby and have no abilities to communicate to people or defend your existence, looks is the only thing you have.

so, as he grew younger and bigger, he met a young girl Daisy. (cue for romantic violin song) and at this point, it was rather disturbing for me. it was. reaally. because the girl looked as if she fell in love at first sight. and not knowing that Benjamin is her age with a disease. so at first, its like, a young girl falling for an old man. a really old man. *grabs bucket to vomit* but later on, in the scene where they were under the bed, (woahh, hold on your thoughts okay, it was UNDER not ON the bed. and it was an innocent child like thing) Daisy explained that she could see through him. that he's not as old as he looks and that she thinks he is sick. which is SHOCKINGLY accurate. think think think. a seven year old girl, having the ability to know something about someone without anyone telling her. i think the producers and directors being a bit too kind. like it was soo easy to find someone who understands you. and only from a couple of meetings. tsk. (dont let my pessimist side fool u into thinking that i didnt like the movie, i did..). So anyway, the scene after that was sad and funny. because Daisy's motheer caught them under the bed and started scolding daisy. she also turned to look at Benjamin and said, "you should be ashamed of yourself!" now that's sad. coz being a 7 year old kid in a 70 year old body must have confused him. and from here, we understand that people's perception differ if they dont know sumthing. Like in the case of Daisy's mom, she must have thought that Benjamin was a chi ko pek (pervert) who preys on young girls, not knowing that Benjamin is the same age as her daughter. but still, the innocent romance that was innitiated by the girl still lingers. (I PROTEST! guys should innitiate!)

He found a job as a seaman and the story kind of goes back and forth. with him moving away and coming back. and each time, you'd be able to see how different he and Daisy looks, and at which point of their life they were at. i guess the intensifying stage between the two would be that when, Benjamin realises that he wants to pursue Daisy but Daisy was already on her own track to her own dreams (ding! ding! ding! differences of priorities leading to conflict) to be a successful dancer. BUT, tragedy hits once again, (im nt telling you what because how it was narrated to the audience was THE most creative way one could ever explain. so go watch it) and Daisy couldnt dance anymore. She went back to the same home where Benjamin and her first met, and the romance between the two got intergrated and finally went on couple status. they bought a house, had fun and had a baby. everything was going fine, until, Benjamin got scared of the future. how the baby might need a father, and with him growing younger each day, he didnt want to be a playmate to his daughter. It was a painful departure the day he left his family and went on a world exploration trip. (i guess he did live a fulfilling life).

The ending was a bitter sweet moment (not to mention, the part where i almost bawled my eyes out) and something that i would not spoil for those who plan on watching it. i mean, by now, i'd have spoiled 1/3 of the show. but oh well, something that you have to experience for yourself. a true love story. one with rollercoaster of emotions. there's humour, suspense, romance, heartbreaks, excitement. a true depiction of life whether or not you were born with that disease. it was just a different perspective of life. and interesting thought of how life would be, reversed.

so, for those who have watched it, comment on your fave parts!. for those who didnt, comment anyways..anything you agree or disagree with whatever i've written. thank you!

FUN FACT!

The origin of the English word “orgasm” derives from the Greek, “orgaein,” meaning “to swell” or “be excited or lustful."

YouTube - Chick vs. Dick: EP29 - The Persuasion Challenge

Paralinguistic skills and Body Language= effective communication?

So, this week in class, we talked about non-verbal skills as well as verbal non-verbal cues. that is also known as paralinguistic skills. and since I had already written on body language (which I dearly regret since I would have been able to write a little more on this entry instead) I would like to share this interesting mode of communication. As we know, (or at least as the COMM students know) paralinguistic skills is the study of verbal non-verbal cues which focuses on the quality of voice ie. tone, pitch, volume. Vocalics, which is communication via the sound other than the words, Non-fluencies- filled pauses and silence.

I was fortunate enough to stumble over this video while trying to de-stress myself from thinking of what to blog about this week, in the ever infamous blog space, http://www.xiaxue.blogspot.com/. yes. I'm sure many have heard of her or even became avid readers of her very honest opinions and thoughts on everyday issues. I could almost hear a LOUD RINGING sound when i watched this video and decided that this should be my topic for this week.

So, in this video, KayKay (guys, don't start denying you don't know her okay...FHM ring a bell?) and Paul (-nods- yes, the emo guy from Singapore idol) are competing at being the better persuader. It is indeed interesting to compare their approaches as they are not able to direct a person to do what they want by instructing them. instead they have to be creative in their body language, or manipulation of words to get the idea across to the unsuspecting passerby.

I would say that in general, Paul has better persuasive skills compared to Kay Kay. In my humble opinion, a pretty young girl, would obviously have upperhand in persuasions compared to a guy. (and a not so attractive guy at that). Notice how KayKay whines a lot? Her pitch gets a lot higher when she's attempting to ask for a favour. and that most of the favours she asked from are guys! clever indeed. sexual attraction can create favourable answers. KayKay relies most of her persuasive skills by appearing helpless, and submissive. bringing it back to body language, notice her posture, stance and movement when she asks for favours. she's always slightly hunching, making herself appear smaller than she is, touching her neck, probably using a little of flirtation skills and also, she's constantly smiling which is well, requires no explanation when you want to ask for favours. As for voice power, her high pitched voice made her seem like a little helpless girl. Looking at when she wanted an ice-cream from an old man, she constantly whines and says,"i dont like to share" and proceeded to pout her lips a bit making the old man feel like he needed to buy her an ice cream to appease the inner child within her. that was one way how body language, as well as paralinguistic skills is an effective way of communication!

Coming to a more interesting point, was how Paul dealt with the challenge. Being slightly less attractive than his competitor, he has to work alot harder. his first task was interesting as he needed to ask a guy to kiss him on the cheeks. His first score, was to get an ang-moh (okay..you all know the slang) to do this. why? simple. ang-moh guys are more open minded about such things as compared to conservative Singaporean!(culture plays a big difference in effective communication) Also, he used many "errrrm" to fill in the pauses, indicating that he is feeling rather awkward of the situation or unwilling to proceed with the challenge. you can see the non-fluencies on the ang-moh side as well. when Paul asked him "how open are you" and he replied "errrrrrrrr, it depends". indicating that he is scared of the consequences if he answers truthfully. THEREFORE, when you are trying to convince someone, try to not have so many non-fluencies in your speech. having many errrm and ahhhh creates an impression of lack of confidence or knowledge, making you appear less credible. Paul also used body language to hint on the idea of kissing by pouting his lips. this can be seen clearly when the ang-moh said "oh yea? you want a kiss? i had that impression". see how body language is vital to sending your idea across?

Apart from that, you can't always believe the videos to show you GENUINE reaction from the public on the persuasive skills of these two celebrity. because environment also affects communication (remember people?). Them being aware that it is recorded and that they would be on a website for millions of viewers,of course, tendencies of them to be more sociable, nice, and open minded to some of their crazy ideas would be more likely. i mean, in a REAL situation, with no cameras and no celebrities, would you entertain them? highly likely, NO. good example would be people who pester you to do surveys along Orchard road. tsk tsk. they're a bunch of people i'd recommend a class on persuasion.

i tend to favour body language rather than paralinguistic skills. but it does not mean that paralinguistic aren't useful at all. In negotiations, voice and the words you use also play an important role. just like body language, sounds create impressions. supposing you say "you are not fat!" in an angry tone of voice, very serious, and saying out each word sharply and fast paced. what would the impact of the speech be? compared to saying, "you are sooooooooooo not FFFat..hahahaha". how would the difference in voice tones, pace and other sounds (ie laughter) affect the meaning of your speech?

So people, the next time you ask for a favour,take not of your phrasing, your tones, your fluency as well as your body language to achieve that desired effect!

FACT OF THE DAY:
Seven out of ten people cross their left arm over their right arms. =)

mind your body

What is communication? How do we communicate?

at this point, i am anticipating COM students to flip through their notes and giving me all the communication models that were taught (and tested for our quiz!) as your answers. but really, lets be parsimonious (yes, a new word i learn from psy class). Communication in its simplest form would be the interaction between two or more human beings. or if you like to talk to animals because that happens to be your thing then so be it. But there's SO many ways of interacting. lets just talk about interaction of humans via face-to-face. because essentially, thats how humans communicate. People can live without communicating through technology (yes people, we can) but it is IMPOSSIBLE for people to not communicate face-to-face. unless you live in another planet and the population of human beings there is one, assuming no other life forms that are as intelligent as us. okae, pardon the idol of the cave tendancies.

So, in a face to face interaction, how exactly do we communicate? According to Albert Mehrabian, a pioneer researcher of body language in the 1950s, in a face to face conversation, the total impact of a message is about 7% verbal, 38% vocal (tone of voice, inflection and other sounds) and 55% non-verbal. this is also supported by anthropologist Ray Birdwhistell that found that the verbal component in a conversation is less than 35%! meaning,most of our communication (over 65%) is done non-verbally. So, dear readers, MIND YOUR BODY. how you move,be it your hands, legs, eyebrows or even the dialation of your pupils would subconciously be sending messages to your receivers!

Body language has often intrigued me to the highest level. i've been obsessed with self-help books that teach us to decode the body language. how to tell if someone is flirting, or lying, or uncomfortable. sure, it take years and years of practice ( for those who wrote the books, years and years of reserach) and it is never always accurate, but to me,it is FUN and empowering. espescially when i'm right! and believe me, it has helped me in quite a bit of my life after i invest my time in it. You know how sometimes, we feel like we know something, but cant quite pin point what exactly is telling us that? IT IS BODY LANGUAGE. so technically, the truth has always been out there. it is whether you can detect it or not. exactly the reason why i like learning abt body language. it is a skill. and it is also something you can manipulate in order to bring about a certain impression from your audience.

We all, in some ways have a basic skill in decoding body language. like we can feel when someone is sad or dissappointed even when they're not saying a word. (remember this friends? silence is a form of communication) SO, why dont we polish up what is already there? go to a book store, go to search engines and find out more about body language. i assure you that, it WILL benefit your life. start empowering yourself now.

SHARE TME;
-the handshake. if a person shakes your hand with his palms facing upwards, he is being submissive or has submissive characteristic. and if its facing downwards, he is a power player. one who likes to be in control.
- basically, when the palm is exposed while interacting, it is a non-threatening gesture which usually indicates comfort or friendliness. and when palms are turned face down, it projects immediate authority. (think hitler)
- touching a stranger on their elbows for not longer than three seconds before asking a favour, would give you better response. up to three times the chances of getting what you want. (of course not ridiculous favours!)
- the eyebrow flash (moving your brows up for a split second and then dropping it down again) which we use as a 'long-distance' hello, is actually a social greeting signal used by apes and monkeys. (maybe darwin was right....haha)

tell me what are your opinions on knowing body language! useful? not useful? interesting or dull?
OR if you already know some, SHARE! what are the common body language that people use and how you interpret it? lets discuss!

joke of the day!
how do you know when a politician is lying?
-when their lips are moving.